People pleasers always want to make others happy and forget about their own feelings. In fact, people-pleasing is unhealthy. Overcoming(战胜) people-pleasing can be done by changing a few habits. Here are 3 things a people pleaser should practice to change.
1. Stop saying sorry.
Saying sorry is my first action when things go awry. If you’re a people-pleaser too, the minute something goes wrong, you probably jump to say sorry. Before you say sorry, stop and look at the situation. If you are wrong, say you’re sorry. However, if you aren’t, don’t say sorry.
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It is easy to say yes to everything. Overcoming people-pleasing includes understanding that you can say no and mean it. Saying no may be hard, but the more you say it, the more you understand how important it is to say.
3. Speak up.
People pleasers like to agree with others. We are quiet, listening, waiting to agree with whatever decision is reached. Many times, I simply stayed quiet and agreed, even when I really didn’t like whatever the plans were. But I became unhappy because I was working on something I didn’t agree with. Overcoming people-pleasing needs learning to really use your voice—even if it means shouting to be heard.
It’s not easy to go against a nature. As you work on overcoming people-pleasing, you’ll fall into old patterns(方式). I do—often. The best part is that we can get a new day to try all over again.
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