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Talk to people you disagree with

Everyone sometimes has disagreements with friends or family members. For example, you might not agree about what game to play, which restaurant makes the best pizza.___1___

Disagreements are uncomfortable. There are some steps you can take to make the conversation meaningful. Here is how.

See their attitude

Even if you disagree with someone, you can still listen to what they say. Let them know that you’re paying attention to them by listening carefully with interest. Another way to show that you’re listening is by asking questions or repeating what they said. ___2___

Use polite language

When someone has an opinion you don’t agree with, don’t pay too much attention to it. ___3___

Instead, focus on speaking calmly (沉着地). For example, you may begin with “I feel” or “I see this in another way”.

Stick to the facts

If you have a strong opinion, it’s better to stick to the facts instead of feelings. ___4___ Then relax your shoulders and speak in a calm voice. If you are stopped by some person, you can remind the person that it’s your turn to speak. Then give him another chance to speak later.

Find common ground

If you find that you can’t change the other person’s mind, and they may not change yours.

___5___ You may also get a better understanding of each other’s opinion. In the end, it’s worth the effort because healthy communication builds strong relationships and communities.

A. Still look for the points you agree on.

B. Start by asking if you can share your opinion.

C. If this happens to you, you’d better say sorry to your friends.

D. Avoid using impolite adjectives, like “stupid” “foolish” or “silly”.

E. You can start by saying, “OK. I understand you. You are saying...”

F. Sometimes you may disagree with your friends about more serious subjects.